Reflections on Black Joy by Lindsey White
So excited to share a guest essay about Black Joy and how we can all celebrate it. Plus, five links for you.
Welcome to So Many Thoughts, a semi-weekly newsletter about royal style and the other parts of life I want to think through with you. You can subscribe here and follow me on Instagram at @EHolmes. Thank you!
Hello! One big goal I had when I relaunched this newsletter was to bring in new voices, new perspectives, new thoughts. So I am thrilled to share with you today the first guest essay, by Lindsey White on celebrating Black Joy.
A bit about Lindsey: She is an influencer and writer who specializes in pop culture and entertainment. She worked as a professional dancer in Los Angeles for seven years, dancing with Ariana Grande at the MTV Video Music Awards, the Jonas Brothers on James Corden, and as an animated character in Trolls World Tour. She graduated from The University of Alabama with a degree in dance and TV and Film Production. She tells me she is very passionate about Alabama Football and college sports.
We first connected over Instagram (naturally!) years ago and I have loved watching Lindsey expand her reach. She runs @TheFormerMsTig, which is filled with fantastic throwback photos of Meghan from now along with her pre-royal days. Lindsey also has a twice-monthly newsletter, Keep Me Posted. On her personal Instagram account, @Lindsey_E_White, she is celebrating Black History Month by sharing mini profiles on members of the Black community who are “moving the needle in different industries.” (You can catch up on the people she has spotlighted so far in her profile highlights).
So many thanks to Lindsey for her willingness to share her thoughts on Black Joy with us. xx
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(Photo by Matt Samuels)
Black Joy
By Lindsey White
When you think of the word joy, you may often think of what brings you pleasure and happiness. It's something humans on this earth are striving for daily. What on this earth makes us truly happy? It's the simple things, right?
You are probably wondering, isn’t this a given? Aren’t we all supposed to find our joy in life? My answer is: Yes, absolutely. In fact, that is my number one prayer for you. But as Black women and men, our joy hasn’t always been celebrated. Our past isn’t joyful. Our past is what we celebrate, and our future is what we are running towards.
Black Joy is a way of making space for joy and positive experiences apart from — and in opposition to — the trauma, tragedy, and struggles perpetuated by the anti-Black racism and oppression of white supremacy. It’s a way to push back against the pervasive depictions of Black trauma and tragedy in media and discourse.
What does Black Joy look like? Black Joy is unapologetically owning all parts of the Black experience, which is different for everyone. It’s important to understand that Blackness is not a monolith. We come from different backgrounds, cultures, regions, shades, and shapes.
I experienced many people questioning my Blackness and why I acted a certain way. Growing up in a small suburb in Houston, Texas, I felt like I wasn't Black enough. My peers were comparing me to other Black girls, which left me feeling super insecure. I didn't have the stereotypical body type or talk a certain way. I lived in a predominantly white community, I loved how I grew up but I didn't understand why people were so mean or questioned my Blackness. But as I got older, and talked to other people, I realized that we all, at some point felt the same way. Our society — and even our community — made us feel less than. Now, our community isn't perfect, it is just the reality we live within our spaces. Blackness is very nuanced like every other race. Blackness is described in different ways for everyone.
The term Black Joy comes with layers and context for different people, too. Alyson, a marriage and family therapist from Virginia, says, “Once I learned to enjoy the natural parts of my being — my specific vernacular, soulful nature, maternal healing, and spiritual power — that I embody as a Black woman, it felt good to be me and share my light with the world regardless of how some may be intimidated by its shine.”
So what does Black Joy look like? To Rachel, a lawyer in Dallas, it is success. She told me she experiences Black Joy when she sees other Black women being successful. Our society, for so long, made it seem there was only room for one of us. Taking up space just like everyone else is Black Joy.
To me, Black Joy is authentic. Most of our past consisted of us trying to exist without losing who we are. Our authenticity is often not perceived well. When I go out to dinner with a group of Black women, and we are laughing and having a good time, we will most likely get looked at like we are a disturbance — one of the thousands of examples of our human experience that gets questioned. The hairstyles we chose to have or the speech we use all come from a place of expression and that expression sometimes comes at a cost. Black Joy is about celebrating our authentic nature, which is seen differently in everyone.
To Meghan, a fashion influencer from Houston, Black Joy is freedom. We all want freedom without condition, the ability to be fully who we are and the ability to change along the way is part of everyone's human experience. Black Joy is celebrating us—despite what the world perceives.
So how can a non-Black individual celebrate Black Joy? First, remember we are human first before our race. So much of our past made us look and feel like we were less than human. Second, it is ok to notice our race and our differences. It is no longer cool to be colorblind—as well-intended as that term is, it served as legit blindness to pain and struggle. Third, Black men and women are not your pet projects. We don’t need saving. We need friends who will listen and recognize that we may never understand each other, but we will choose to celebrate what we don't understand. Fourth, it is ok to ask questions! You don't have to know everything. The joy about all of this is being in a community with people, who you can learn from.
Lastly, Black Joy is a celebration of all of who we are. The unknown and the in-between. Joy is for all.
What does Black Joy look like to you? Where do you notice it in our culture today? How do you plan on celebrating it? Please hit “Join the discussion” at the bottom of this email and share in the comments.
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Thank you, Lindsey! You can follow her on Instagram at @Lindsey_E_White and @TheFormerMsTig (her Meghan Markle fan account with fantastic throwback pics!) as well as subscribe to her newsletter, Keep Me Posted.
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Five Things To Check Out This Week
READ / My friend and former colleague Laura Meckler has an in-depth, chilling look at the toll the debate over teaching critical race theory has had on teachers. (Washington Post)
READ / Why does Dolce & Gabbana seem to be un-cancellable? UGH! I have wondered this for so long. Tahirah Hairston explains how the problematic Italian brand used its deep pockets and connections with VIPs. (The Cut)
LISTEN / The Daily unravels the Joe Rogan situation at Spotify. This episode felt a tad too soft on Rogan himself, but helps explain the rise of the controversial host and the business interests at play. (New York Times / The Daily)
READ / The New York Times has changed Wordle — eliminating some obscure words, making two answers possible, etc — and people are big mad. (The Verge)
REMEMBER / A reframing for well beyond Black History Month, from @bilalharrykhan and @TheConsciousKid. (Instagram)
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I’ll see you back in your inboxes later this week with a royal deep dive on Mary, Crown Princess of Denmark. On the heels of her incredible 50th birthday portraits and ahead of Kate’s visit next week, I thought it was the perfect time to learn a bit more about her.
Have a wonderful week, friends. And thank you again to Lindsey!
Have Thoughts to share? Hit “Join the Discussion” and leave a comment on my Bulletin page. You can also send me an email at Hello@SoManyThoughts.com.
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